Rod's Story
by Cosmic Castaway
Summary: Why does Bosco hate suicide so much? Here is my take on it :


Summery: Why does Bosco hate suicide so much? Here is my take on it   
  
Rating: R *because of the content and the issues*   
  
Disclaimer: Oh dear not this again I shall not say what I have to...oh fine you got me out of it, I do not own any of the characters I use in it. Oh wait yes I do, some of them but not the important ones *sigh* anyways don't' own nothing so don't sue me.   
  
Author Note: Thank you to those who encouraged me to go through this. Jewel thank you for telling me to go ahead, Bee and Sarabeth you guys I don't know how I ever wrote fanfic without you two, thank you so much for your comments as your to Dem and Kich means so much to me so thank you all.   
  
Now onto the small story, enjoy....  
  
  
It was a call like any other call. A mother's voice screaming on the other end of the phone, wanting, needing an answer from the person she was talking to. The dispatcher trying to calm them down, desperately wanting to understand the mother's cries.   
  
The wail of the siren screamed for other vehicles to get out of the way as they raced to the unknown, but nothing will stop what people call fate....destiny.   
  
Coming to a halt in front of the house. The house that held so many stories and memories that only the family knew and as the steps of the officers could be heard coming up to the door, they could hear screaming from upstairs.   
  
It happened too quickly. They threw open the bedroom door where they could see the disturbance occurring. They tried talking to the child as the mother stood to the side crying, yelling, and willing her son to listen to her. But he wouldn't. Not today. He wouldn't listen to anyone, not to the person who raised him, listen to the ones sworn to protect him, and he wasn't going to listen to his conscious telling him this was a bad idea.   
  
The gun is cocked and the child is sobbing, wanting to be helped but his mind is too far out in another world to be helped and to him nobody is listening. Nobody wants to either.   
  
Once pointed at his mother to make sure she stayed clear, the gun is now at his temple, the tears sliding even faster down his cheeks. Words come out of his mouth but to him they will never understand him.   
  
Time froze. The officers couldn't move forward for fearing they would get shot and before they could do anything the kid looked up at his ceiling and he whispered 6 words as his life past before him.   
  
"Mom, this is not your fault."   
  
  
A terrible loud sound echoed in the minds of those three people. It could be heard throughout the house and it ricocheted to the residents close by. Dogs could be heard barking, other sirens could be heard down the block roaring up the street.   
  
But inside the room everything was at a standstill. Eyes trained on the boy. The child's head rocked back and forth for only a second and then his entire body shook. Eyes flickering for a second, then the light died out in his pupils and the male child slacked and slumped to the floor.   
  
His mother crumpled to the ground right beside him. No noise as she picked up her lifeless son by the upper body and flipped him around so he was now facing up in her arms. She began to rock him back and forth, back and forth, as though he was just a little one seeking comfort in her arms only.   
  
Then a terrible sound emerged from the mother. The sounds of one's heart completely breaking into two pieces. A pitch that could only come from a mother losing a child right before their eyes and not being able to do a damn thing.   
  
They could only stand there. Blinking. Both officers had just watched a male commit suicide in front of them and all they could do was stand there and blink their eyes.   
  
  
Faith Yokas looked at her partner. She knew how he felt about suicides, never really understanding where the anger came from but she knew how he felt about them and she respected that. But as she looked at him and thought she would see some kind emotion she saw nothing. No emotion, no hint of hostility, grief, nothing, and that frightened her more than anything.   
  
Stepping away and trying to pull Bosco away from the scene as he just stared at the mother and child in the teenager's room.   
  
"Come on." She then grabbed him by the shoulders when she felt like he wasn't moving quick enough.   
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*   
  
"Bosco? Bosco are you okay....Bosco speak to me,....Bosco?"   
  
Faith had stopped writing long enough to look and see what her partner was doing. But he was the same as had he been all day, he kept dazing off ever since they got the suicide call.   
  
Looking back down at her paperwork wondering what to do next she let out a breath and looked back up.   
  
"How about you go home. You don't look to good, I'll finish what we have here, don't worry."   
  
She watched for anything, but to her dismay, nothing. Not a hint of gratitude, not a slight annoyance, just nothing. He just got up and left not even looking back and all she could do was sit there and watch him leave.   
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Bosco walked into his apartment. He locked it behind him and threw his gun and keys up on the counter as he bypassed it and walked right to the refrigerator and threw it open grabbed the casing of 6pack and then walked to his recliner and slumped into it.   
  
He turned on the TV and took his first swig of his drink and just hoping on hope that the day events would just go away in a blur. He blinked his eyes, trying to clear them, trying so hard to watch something to pique his interest so he would keep his mind off that one day, that one fateful day his best friend committed suicide.   
  
(Past)   
  
"Rod, honey. Come on dear, don't you want some dinner?"   
  
Rod sat in his room. The room was dark, blinds shut tight, clothes scattered about, plates with half eaten food and other stuff in the room even Rod couldn't explain how it got there.   
  
He felt like he was in his realm, nobody could intervene nobody could bug him. The music played on, as he felt like he was some kind of a deep sleep, a slumber of narcolepsy that he never wanted to come out of as the buzzer ran throughout the house. Rolling his eyes wondering who in the hell was coming to bother him now.   
  
Arms crossed under his head, laying with eyes looking straight at the ceiling, he listened to his mother's sweet voice answering the call. But once more she would come back to bug him.   
  
"Honey, it's one of your friends."   
  
Rod could feel the anger in his stomach begin to rise up. Friends, he barely had any, like he would want any in the first place, the way people acted and even then his "friends" could care less about his troubles.   
  
"Tell them to get lost." he yelled threw the door.   
  
"I don't think so honey, it's your little buddy Maurice."   
  
  
His mother stood by the door, praying and just trying to figure out what was going on in the her son's mind. She had tried so hard to get him to come out of his room but she couldn't. Only she heard her son move about and out of nowhere he came flying out and with a quick kiss to the cheek he was out the door, leaving her to stand there wondering what had just happened.   
  
  
"Hey man, you look like shit!"   
  
"Oh and you better looking then me you little Italian man."   
  
Maurice Boscorelli smirked and then lightly punched Rod on the shoulder.   
  
"What the hell have you been up to man? I haven't seen you at school in a couple days where the hell have you been?" Bosco looked at his friend. He didn't understand what was going on with him. Something was crying out to him, but nobody had taught him to ask for help. All the signs here clear telling Bosco that not everything was okay with his best buddy. Yet, he didn't know what to do. He could see the dark circles under Rod's eyes and the way he had acted so distant lately. Only Bosco begins to throw it off as just a phase.   
  
"I needed time to, ummmm, yeah think that, ummmm thank you for everything. You were a true friend to me, so thank you."   
  
Laughing in a almost nervous way Bosco placed the one of his hands behind his neck and rubbed the back of it.   
  
"Thanks man, I think."   
  
Bosco began walking away thinking Rod was going to follow yet he soon realized that Rod wasn't coming.   
  
"I guess you can't walk?"   
  
"Naaaa, I have to go and eat." Rod then smiled "Goodbye Maurice."   
  
Turning around Rod walked back into the apartment complex as Maurice Boscorelli stood there.   
  
"Weird."   
  
(Present Time)   
  
"If your friend is acting strange, not catching sleep, distancing themselves, talking in present tense and saying goodbye...."   
  
Bosco took another sip of his beer. He rolled his eyes on the "Get Help" for the suicide commercial. He wanted nothing more then to throw the beer bottle at the television but he resisted the urge just knowing he would regret it later. He flipped the commercial and to another channel.   
  
"Suicide is out this year and...." Bosco flipped the movie "Scream" off of Fox.   
  
"In other news, stastics shows that suicide...."   
  
Flipping the channel Bosco couldn't help wonder why every time you don't want to see something or hear about it on TV, that is all you see. He flipped it for the last time and stopped on the movie channel "Stars" and thought he could catch a good movie before he feel asleep.   
  
As he focused on the movie he suddenly recognized it. He couldn't find the remote, his fingers wouldn't move, his hand was stuck on his body as he tried to will himself from not watching. The loud gunshot went throughout the room.   
  
Bosco had resisted the entire night to throw something to yell at something but stumbling on the ending of Romeo & Juliet, it was the last straw.   
  
Letting out an almost growl Bosco threw angrily at the T.V, only his impaired judgment from the 6 bottles of the alcoholic beverage caused him to miss his aim and the beer bottle smashed against the wall next to the television set.   
  
The TV snapped off after the next bottle hit its mark, the outlet plug next to the television.   
  
Now in complete pitch black Bosco yelled at the now blank screen.   
  
"Sick, stupid, lusting movie! Teens committing suicide over love, it's CALLED LUST YOU JAGOFF'S!" Bosco snickered at his own remark. Then his own once smirking face turned into anger and he could only mutter,  
  
"Rod, you selfish bastard."   
  
(Past)   
  
Maurice sat in his room. Mikey was gone, spending the night at his friend's house, and he was stuck at the apartment with his mother. He had already tried to ask if he could also go somewhere but for some reason his mother was being a tight ass and not letting him go. So there he was sitting on his bed just sitting and pouting. Knowing if he walked out of his room he would see his mother drowning herself in her liquor and for Maurice it was a sight he didn't want to see.   
  
Eyeing the window he got up and called a couple of his friends see if they were meeting in the park as usual. Before he hung up the friend asked what was wrong with Rob, that he was not coming outside he said he had something to do, so Maurice said he would run by his house and drag his lazy ass out of the house kicking and screaming if he had to. The friend hung up and Maurice walked to the window and then slid it open, slid himself out and then shut the window behind and made his way down the fire escape and ran all the way to Rod's house.   
  
(Rods house)   
  
Maurice stood outside continually ringing the buzzer but nobody answered. In frustration he went to the fire escape out back where he knew there was a way into the house so he jumped up and pulled it down and began to climb up.   
  
Getting to the level he knew would be Rod's, he looked inside just in case it wasn't his apartment, wouldn't want to be breaking and entering. So he peeked in and smirked realizing it was and so he tried the window and he was happy to find out it was unlocked so he slid it open and his small body fit through the window. Closing it behind him he called out Rod's name but no answer. Shrugging he went to Rod's room and as he grasped the door handle and turned he could hear the melo dramatic music that Rod sometimes played when he was depressed and as he opened the door he stood there.   
  
The first thing Maurice saw was Rod standing there looking up at ceiling and the 9mm weapon in his hand. Spinning around Rod looked at Bosco with teary eyes. He had seen the light penetrate his dark room and knew somebody was there probably to stop him. He pointed the gun at Bosco fearing he would try to stop him.   
  
Bosco's eyes got wide but he didn't move when he saw the gun pointed at him, automatically throwing his hands in front of him in defense he dared not step forward. He could see Rod's face was pale and the dark circles were standing out against his paleness and before Bosco knew what was happening the gun was again pointed at Rod's temple.   
  
"I'm sorry man," the tears were chocking his voice and he couldn't speak "I didn't want you to see this, God please forgive me, tell Mom this isn't her fault and I'm sorry man." Looking up at the ceiling he let the tears fall he clicked the gun back.   
  
Bosco screamed at his friend, he felt his body moving and he ran towards his best friend but as his body hit Rod's, Rod had already shot the gun and the bullet tore threw his skull, killing him instantly. He was too late, Bosco had moved too slow and now his friend was lying under him and he could see the blood beginning to ooze out of his friend's fatal wound.   
  
His mind didn't know what to do. He slid off of his now dead friend. How do you register something to this magnitude? Not knowing what to do he just slowly got up and looked around trying to figure what had just went wrong, what had he done so wrong. He was to slow, he was everything everybody told he was, pathetic and slow. Bosco taking one more look at his friend his feet began to go backwards and he then spun around and ran outside of the room, ran as fast as he could, out the door, and out of the apartment building. Running, not stopping, he ran all the way back home as he felt tears beginning to threaten his vision as he ran home.   
  
He was back in his room and he was hiding in his closet not sure why he would go there but it always seemed like you could hide anything and everything that bothered you in the dark damps of the closet.   
  
Curling up into some clothes that he had hidden to make his room cleaner he could feel his body completely shudder. He could still feel the sticky blood on parts of his body and as he laid in the closet daring not to come out for inside, nobody could tell him he was wrong for crying. Nobody could call him a wimp, nobody could tell him that 'boys don't cry' and as everything came out he felt like he was going to be sick. But he refused to come out and he just let himself cry himself to sleep but before he let go and let sleep take him fully he promised himself one thing and one thing only, never would he look at suicide as anything an extremely selfish thing to do.   
  
(Present)   
  
Faith didn't know why she was there. But she knew her partner was not thinking straight at the moment witnessing something like that. So first she headed towards his mother's bar just to see if he was there, nursing a drink off in the far corner as his mother tended bar. Only when she walked in and there was no Bosco, to her dismay. Before she walked out she heard Angela.   
  
"Hey Faith."   
  
She nodded and said 'hey' but as she turned she wanted to know what made Bosco hate suicide so much and Faith knew she could always get his mother to tell her things. So turning around she went and asked if she could speak to Angela privately.   
  
They were upstairs as Angela poured some tea for both herself and Faith and sat down as Faith stood by the door, uneasy that she was here with Bosco's mother when he wasn't here.   
  
"So what can I do for you, Faith?"   
  
"Well, we handled a suicide today and Bosco been acting rather distance and I was wondering...."   
  
"Why he hates suicides so much?"   
  
Faith sighed and nodded her head.   
  
"Bosco had a best friend....oh dear what was that boy's name, well anyways, his friend committed suicide right in front of him, shot himself right in the temple and Bosco witnessed it all. I found him the next day curled up in the closet fresh tears still on his face, poor thing. I wasn't sure how he would really react to it, but my Maurice the trooper." Angela Rose Boscorelli gave a grim face.   
  
"Thank you Angela I better let you get back to your bar."   
  
"You take care Faith and hey Faith."   
  
Faith stopped on the steps and turned around.   
  
"Please take care of my boy, protect him."   
  
Smiling "Always."   
  
She had reached Bosco's apartment. Looking at her watch she watched as the watch struck 1.am. She saw there were no lights on in his apartment and making sure he was there she saw his car was parked out back. Sighing heavily she made it upstairs holding the keys that she used to get into the place and the key she would get into Bosco's apartment. He had a key like hers, both gave each other keys just in case something would ever go wrong and needed to get in without having to break the door down.   
  
First she knocked hoping on hope that Bosco would just answer the door and she wouldn't have to come walking in but she figured what the hell. If he was asleep she would walk out but she wanted to make sure he was okay and when he didn't answer the door she just went ahead and unlocked it with her key.   
  
Trying not to slip on any bottles that layed about the house she made her way towards the bedroom where for some reason there were no lights on. She knew that Bosco always had a light on no matter what; only it was pitch black inside the room the only thing lightening it up was some of the lights from the city peeking through the blinds. Almost turning around and walking out she looked at the closet and saw a tiny light could be seen under the door. Walking over she held her breath and opened the closet.   
  
There sitting on the floor was Bosco he was rocking back and forth looking completely zoned out in his own world. She bent down and than sat down outside of the door. Not knowing what to do she just sat there and then placed a hand on his that were wrapped around his legs.   
  
"I hate him."   
  
Faith looked at Bosco, he was still rocking back and forth and was looking straight and not taking his eyes off the wall not even to look at her.   
  
"You don't hate him, that was your best friend."   
  
Knowing that Faith had gone to see his mother, just knowing Faith all to well he knew he could say that and she would respond to it.   
  
"Yes I do hate him for what he did. I hate that I saw the signs and I didn't stop it. I hate that he was so selfish he only thought he had problems. I hate that he took his life and didn't even try getting help....I just hate him."   
  
"Bosco....people can have things wrong with them, maybe he had bipolar or manic depression, you know something seriously wrong that caused him to think that was the only solution."   
  
He blinked and then looked at Faith and then looked down and then looked back with hatred still in his eyes.   
  
"You don't understand, do you? Till you had actually somebody you know commit suicide you can never relate or understand. This is something you can't understand. I do not care if he had something wrong with him, I do not care if it was some sort of disease, instead of crying out for help he thought it would be better by just going out the most selfish way and end it by taking his life. It's selfish, it's stupid and it's bullshit to put your family through. He fucked everybody up. Anybody he came into contact with he fucked them up royally, and because of him, nothing was ever the same again. I couldn't comprehend what he had done when I was younger but I know now that it was stupid and nothing will ever change my opinion on it. Nothing in this world will ever change it, I can't bring him back for his family and I can't ever hear his laugh again and I will never have my best friend back for all it's worth I'll never see him again as long as I live."   
  
Bosco looked down and then away from Faith.   
  
"I hate him with such a passion and it's all his fault, all of it."   
  
Faith sat there. She had saw the one tear roll down his check but she quickly dismissed it so Bosco wouldn't get embarrassed knowing he would never admit that he cried let alone let one single tear fall in front of her.   
  
So maneuvering just right Faith reached up and hugged her partner. Sometimes all you just need is a hug when things look the worse and as Bosco continued to look away from Faith he still embraced the hug by falling back into it. She rubbed his back and gently rocked back and forth like a mother would do for their sick child.   
  
Both sat there in the closet. Not saying a single word just sat there.   
  
The good thing about a closet is you can hide things, and you can keep things in there that nobody has to know about. You can have a complete different personality in the dark little space and if you cried or made out with somebody in the closet, that closet stayed shut and that secret would never come out. So Bosco and Faith sat there, never to mention this again for it would stay in the closet forever and as Faith sat there hugging Bosco, Bosco whispered one more thing,  
  
"Rod I hate you....and it is to your fault."   
  
THE END! 


End file.
